Talking about home testing for HIV

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Think you have all the symptoms? Read my story if you are convinced you have HIV

I just want to share my story for the people who are convinced they have contracted HIV in hope that it will help others, because I was one of them until an hour ago. My life has been consumed by fear and the thought of HIV for the last 3 months. I am a young woman with a very irresponsible past, I have had unprotected sex on many occasions with different men I didn’t know while I was at university which I’m not proud to admit but it’s true, I’m not completely careless as I do get tested for the ‘common’ sti’s (chlamydia/gonorrhea) quite often and have always been lucky up until 3 months ago where I contracted chlamydia. Even though I always knew it could happen, I never actually thought it would happen to me, this really hit me hard and scared me, the woman at the clinic also mentioned HIV to me but I was too scared to do the test so I said I didn’t want it, silly I know but I just couldn’t deal with it at the time as I was terrified (it wouldn’t have been accurate/conclusive anyway in regards to the man I contracted chlamydia from as it was too soon). When I went home I started thinking more and more about HIV and I couldn’t get it out my mind, I spent hours and hours every day reading forums on people living with HIV and googling the symptoms and then I displayed nearly ALL of them. This was all between 2-4 weeks after my last exposure as well so I was absolutely convinced it was seroconversion, the timing was perfect. I had a fever, a matching non-itchy rash on both of my shoulders and back (I have NEVER had a rash in my whole life so this is the one that got me the most), swollen painful glands in my neck and under my arms (even my mum told me they looked swollen and I hadn’t told her about any of this), sore throat, muscle aches and pains all over my body, strange headaches (I rarely get headaches either) mouth ulcers, completely white tongue which I thought was thrush, sleepless nights, honestly you name it I had it. The combination of your mind and google search truly is a powerful thing when you’re scared and vulnerable, and I now honestly believe half of my symptoms were down to constant stress and anxiety from overthinking. I never thought I’d find the courage to get tested but I was breaking down and crying nearly every day, it got to the point where I’ve completely isolated myself from my family and friends and I was a shell of a person, and one day I just snapped and thought my life is worse now living like this and not knowing than it would be knowing and actually living with HIV, and I figured I was being selfish burying my head in the sand to the possibility of having it because from the stories I had researched and read other people live completely normal and happy lives with HIV so if they can do it, why couldn’t i? I couldn’t bring myself to go back to the clinic so that’s when I found and ordered BioSure. I completed the test by myself at home which took only 15 minutes, shaking and crying but I knew i had to do it, and it was negative. I’m still in disbelief now because I was 100% convinced I had it, after all my symptoms as well, can you believe that? I feel so incredibly grateful and lucky considering how irresponsible I have been in the past, and my life is going to change from here on out, please anyone reading this use a condom unless you’re in a committed relationship with a person who you know and trust, has been tested and is negative as it isn’t worth the risk. Also to the people that are too scared to get tested like I was, please just take the jump and do it, I know it’s easier said than done but I feel so relieved and at ease finally knowing my status, you’re never going to get an answer on google no matter how much you try like I did, and even if it happened to be positive, you’d be better off knowing so you can get the treatment and live a long and happy life. Thank you to everyone at BioSure for the best early Christmas present ever.

2 Responses

Francesca Bard, BioSure (UK) Ltd
 Work on 13th December 2018

Hi WorriedWellGirl. This has just bought a tear to my eye, it amazes me daily that we are saving peoples lives. Knowledge is power and testing is knowledge. I am so pleased we have helped you and I hope you have a lovely Christmas! Francesca Bard, BioSure (UK) Ltd

 Used on 12th December 2018

worriedWellGirl, I am really happy for you. I have experienced the same. For more than 2 years I worried, developing all the symptoms you mentioned. The power of google and the human mind is beyond belief. I had white tongue, pains, headaches, the lot. Testing is knowing. I wish you all the best and a happy Christmas

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