Talking about home testing for HIV

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The longest night ever!

I am a gay man and have never had an HIV test. Over the course of the past 15 years I have had many sexual partners and although practicing safe or less risky sex with most of them, it has always been a worry at the back of my mind that I may have contracted HIV. I have always been too nervous to go and get tested and worried about the implications on my life if I was to test positive. I guess I have gone through many years of not wanting to know.

I saw the HIV Self Test advertised on a web page I came across quite by accident yesterday morning (19.05.15). I thought to myself this has got to be the easiest way of taking a whole load of weight of my shoulders. I plucked up the courage and ordered the test kit at around 1:00pm on a next day Royal Mail Special Delivery.

Last night has got to be the longest night I have ever experienced, I have hardly slept and at times had to get up and pace around, I was looking at the clock and watching my test kit gradually travel across the country to me on the Royal Mail Tracker. I haven’t eaten this morning and have been literally shaking with nerves.

The postman turned up at 12:45pm, less than 24 hours since ordering the kit. I was impressed with how easy everything was although I was shaking when reading all of the information booklets but didn’t want to make a mistake which would spoil the test. I was worried about using the lancet but I need not have, I didn’t feel it go into my skin. The test barrel immediately pulled up the blood sample so no messing about with that either. I watched the test take place and the 15 minutes seemed like 15 hours, I even waited a further 15 minutes on top just to make sure.

This afternoon the stress I have been living with for so long has been lifted and can draw a line under my sexual past.

I intend to use this kit every three months and would highly recommend it to anybody that is going through something similar to what I have 🙂

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